love letter

choiminghon

from the 1st step out the airport
i found that i'm finally back to the very comfortable embrace and smell in u
and could finally rest in somewhere i need
these nights
watching u slp
i was thinking
my heart is filled up
and is the very first time making me think of the days in future
maybe u would think i always worry too much
and dunt have confidence on every tiny matter
but u should understand how frustrated
to stand up again in one and one and one failed relationships
i fear to be hurt again.

i'm so happy to see ur smile with the present i brought along way back from tokyo
i hope u like it
i just wanna bring u the happiness from wat u want
we should go together next Oct
good weather and temperature in this season
eat eat walk walk shop shop
like we were in taiwan
and i would never forget every moment there
for how many times i told u
it's the happiest trip i've ever had
yesterday julius asked,
u'r not happy in japan?
i said, yes how do u know
'ur words and facial expression tells everything la'
oh really?
yes i dunno to hide any emotion
and everything just come and show on face in an instant way
tat's how i cry out tonight
wat had come out from my mouth
is already enough to ruin everything
u didn't take it serious
or get mad with it
but i really feel sorry and sad
it's something very hurtful to u
and to me
i found no reasonable explanation
and i dunno how to rewind and delete it
so and then the fear comes
and follows the tears
the very first moment i honestly fear to lose u
honestly fear to hurt u
honestly to think the way i should treasure u more

many ppl asked
why u would let me go for such a trip
under such condition
they commented
either u'r silly
or u'r so good that could simply trust me on everything
or i'm just not that important to u and u dunt really care wat might happen next
i answered
i would like to believe that he's a very very good man
cares much and let me do watever i want
this is the most treasurable
and for no doubt
i will treasure him with more and more of my love and care
this is the way to build up a good relationship

i had lesson from the incidents in this half year
time flies
but meanwhile passing slowly like we've experienced too much accordingly
i remembered u asked
will u tell the next lover that 'yes sino is bad in this and this and this... and i couldn't find happiness at all'
no
unexpectedly, things has been striked deep in heart
and i really changed alot becoz of u
aside from being more lan gag
i found that i learn to compromise
and view things in the opposite way like u always do
theoriatically it's easy to say so
but when come to hard and emotional issues
it's no longer that easy to work out
u taught me the secret of doing this
and i gonna keep it in the rest of my life.

sino,
i love you,
though we'd never know wat is love and wat it really means
but with the teardrops leaving on ur pillow tonight
telling me that
for no doubt
i'm really in love with you.

tsangkayee